Eliza Parrott: Counseling + Disabilities
Eliza Parrott is a young, bubbly, wise-beyond-her-years counselor that was brave enough to start her own counseling practice. She saw a need in her community for counseling teens and adults with disabilities, especially in the area of transition, so she dove in. I am thankful for the opportunity to connect with Eliza, hear her amazing journey, and share her with all of you!
When or why should a parent seek out counseling for their child or adult with a disability?
Eliza: There is never a bad time to seek out counseling! Even if nothing is wrong, counseling can always be a good way to add another supportive person to your child’s life. However, there are certainly situations that especially warrant the need for counseling. When a child or adult is first diagnosed with a disability, this is a great time to give the diagnosed individual and/or their family members an opportunity to process this information with someone who specializes in that disability. This can be a complicated time for families that is often filled with mixed emotions; therapy is a safe, nonjudgmental place to discuss initial reactions, feelings and concerns. Secondly, parents should seek out counseling for their child or adult whenever they notice any significant changes in mood or functioning. These include but are not limited to changes in appetite, irritability, social withdrawal, changes in hygiene, decreased engagement in preferred activities, and changes in the quality or amount of sleep. Finally, counseling is a great idea during any major life transition such as puberty, grief, familial changes, and school transitions.
How do parents find the right therapist for their child?
How do they find someone that understands their child's disability?
Eliza: A great place to start is to ask a provider that you’re already working with and trust if they know of any counselors that specialize in or work well with people who are diagnosed with your child’s disability. Additionally, psychologytoday.com is a website that advertises detailed information about local therapists and their areas of expertise.
Do you recommend parents attending sessions with their child or not?
And why?
Eliza: I believe that parents need to be involved in their child’s treatment, but not necessarily in session. Before I start working with a new client, I always like to meet with their parents or caregivers to get background information and to hear their concerns, hopes, and wishes for the client. Once I begin treatment, I like to reserve sessions for the client so they get the full experience of therapy as a private, sacred place just for them. I keep parents involved about what we’re working on, homework I’m assigning, and recommendations about how to support their child via meetings, phone calls and emails.
How does a parent help their child or adult get the most out of each session with their counselor?
Eliza: This often sounds counterintuitive to a parent, but in order for a child to get the most out of their time in therapy, they need to have privacy and independence. Therapy works best when clients are engaged, motivated, and bought into their goals. If a client is there only to work on what a parent wishes to change, there is usually a great deal of resistance. If a parent asks the client to share detailed information about their sessions, their privacy is greatly compromised. A good therapist will keep parents and families informed as to what they can do to support and reinforce the work their child is doing in therapy.
What are the most common and consistent struggles you see among kids, teens, and adults with disabilities?
Eliza: A consistent challenge I see with children, adolescents and adults with varying disabilities is confusion about their diagnosis. While they may know what they are diagnosed with, they may not understand specifically what that means for them and how it may explain certain challenges, feelings and behaviors. Other common challenges include social skill deficits, loneliness, anxiety, depression, anger or frustration, and irritability.
What are common questions or problems areas that parents ask you?
Eliza: Parents often ask me to help them understand what is and what is not explained by their child’s disability. For example, is this typical behavior for a ten-year-old or are we seeing this because of autism? This confusion makes it very difficult for parents to know when or how much to push their child, and when to accept that a certain behavior may be out of their child’s control.
What other advice, tips, wisdom, etc. do you feel would be helpful to share with parents of students with disabilities?
Eliza: Parents often tell me that they feel like they “fall off of a cliff” when their child exits the school system. While a person with a disability is in school, they are in a structured environment that provides social interactions and a variety of supports. When an individual ages out of the school system, those benefits go away. Whether your child plans to pursue secondary education, find a job, or something else, please don’t wait until after they have finished high school to consider these options. This is a very vulnerable time for individuals and their families that often has drastic mental health implications. Work early with your child’s teachers and therapist to start planning how to provide structure, purpose, and meaning into your child’s life after school ends.
Eliza’s contact information is available on my “Birmingham Providers List” post under Resources. Go check her out!
**Eliza Parrott is an Associate Licensed Counselor and Certified Rehabilitation Counselor in private practice in Birmingham. She received her Master's degree from The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill in Clinical Rehabilitation and Mental Health Counseling. Her educational and clinical training specialized in supporting persons with disabilities and their families through psychotherapy, social skills training, and coaching. Her practice provides therapy, support, and advocacy to children, adolescents and adults with disabilities in the Birmingham area.
